a bullet through the heart </3

Friday, December 02, 2005

yesterdae was just full of pain. it controlled my thots. so i guess u saw me. u smile at me. but u looked different. u looked thinner. u looked taller. but that face i cant never forget. even we met and talked for a short moment. u looked so different. u seemed like u knew me. u do. not me. i forgot who u were. but it was familar. blood rushed thru my head. i hope u didnt tell. maybe it was just something between u and me. maybe u still had that special feelings for me. but the time was awkward. she told me. on that day i wasnt sure who i was suppose to have seen. u or her. i couldnt have done anithing. i was wondering where the other 1 was. deep down inside memories began to the words she said... u werent there. i dont noe if u noe things that happened. life's been on the rocks. this is how it has alwaes been. i relie cant believe things i have saw. when i got up. u walked away.

and it was different. all of this. wat was it suppose to say. wat was the meaning. maybe u were right. maybe i shud i gone. but i didnt. and still i dont want to move on. let me be. the quench of thirst of love u crave. the things u said. makes me go around. makes me fall. and fall again. but those moments wit u. were u just playing with me? the times we had. i think u forgot. stop try to take it all away from me. dont feel regret. u wanna be like that. go ahead. its you. not me. someday it'll get up to u. and ur cries will end up in vain. never will i hear. never will i fall into the deep dark hole. because of you i ended up like this. because of you. because of you. the pain that runs thru my vains. u dont noe how i feel. u dont noe how hurt i felt. when u said that. u dont noe a thing abt hurt. while its fun to get others hurt. wats wit you. i dont understand. y do i keep falling. why cant u just the fuck keep out of my way. the more i think the more i wish someone will just kill me and rid me of the feeling that is alike being stab in the heart.

i dont tink i can face it again. it'll be long enuff before i can face it again. u do noe how it feels to be torn apart? do u noe how it feels to be alone? im thankful for the friends i have that cared. the feeling just wont stop. i feel out of control. dont ever speak my name. the wounds never heal wit time. i dont noe y. just get away. it was the only way to be.

it crossed out. the hopes have became doubts... see how things go.

[[ these feelings ]]

[[ these hopes ]]

[[ these blood ]]

talk to da MAN

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